The chapter is aptly titled “A Start”, which ofcourse has a double meaning, as getting startled is a mainstay of the main character.
1.Hello – The first frame depicts a standard opening for most future cartoons where Ansada is just standing there with his arms folded behind his back, and the telephone next to him. This is how the first cartoon was actually drawn by me way back in 1980 some time (sadly I don’t have the exact date, as I was not in the habit of writing the date after every cartoon in those days). Also appropriately, Ansada’s first word is “Hello” as is the first caller’s. The first usage of the sound effect “Dich!!” is used. Most people will not understand how to pronounce this, as they will think it sounds like “Dick!!” or “Ditch!” The correct way to pronounce it would be the way it would sound in German (as in “ich liebe dich” – I love you). Later on, “Zich!” is to be pronounced the same way. One of the games on the Ansada Foneapp is named “Dich”. I learned these sound effects from my best friend in highschool, who invented them. Ansada’s first ever smile is in the 10th frame, and the last frame shows him crying for the first time.
2.Plumber – The water gushing out of the phone was a real nightmare for me to draw (especially in CorelDraw – as I was not used to the software at that time).
3.Timber – I was inspired by an old knock-knock joke for this one. Drawing the tree was a challenge to draw in CorelDraw for the same reasons I stated earlier.
4.Hair – Not one of my favorites, but I was just starting out in those days. It’s the first time we see Ansada’s teeth.
5.Headphones – I thought to myself that if the phone startles Ansada because it is so loud, why doesn’t he just close his ears, or put on headphones. Had that worked though, the story would never be the same. It is the first time we see the telephone show emotions: it smiles.
6.Main Street – Some 4th wall humour here, where Ansada hits the cartoon frame above him.
7.Saved – Here I found CorelDraw useful when it came to drawing the dotted (or dashed) lines depicting the fly’s flight path. It’s also the first time we see Ansada smile with his teeth showing.
8.Touch – More emotions from the phone in this one; confusion, worry, anger and relief. It’s the first time we see Ansada lying flat on the ground.
9.Dentist – Ansada gets a late reaction startle.
10.Won-Ten – It was natural that Ansada’s early startle reaction would follow the late one. In frames 10 and 11, it is the first time that we don’t see Ansada’s entire body.
11.Laugh – Aptly titled because it is the first time we see Ansada laugh.
12.Phoney – By now, Ansada knows that the phone will ring.
13.Angered – Ansada becomes more frustrated by the rings and lashes out. The satisfaction does not last.
14.Kreskin – When I was visiting my elder brother in Boston as he was about to graduate from Babson College in 1985, he had arranged for us to see The Amazing Kreskin who was performing at the college. It was a mind blowing show. It was the first time I had seen people “hypnotized” or succumbing to the power of suggestion. It is also the first time (of only three such occasions) we see Ansada sitting on a chair. The second time is in “Checkers”, and the third in “Trek 20”. This is also the first time that Ansada speaks to the reader.
15.Pail – This is the first time that the telephone threatens to ring before doing so. This affords Ansada a little time to try to stifle the sound by putting a pail over it.
16.Animal – Over the next 5 cartoons, Ansada talks to the reader at the end of the cartoon.
17.Silent – The one and only time where the caller does not say anything.
18.Mental – The caller begins by being cheeky and ends with gibberish.
19.Tailor – I was inspired by the old classic Mad magazines that used this puff / pant / suit combination.
20.Tourette – I had to actually draw the little skull in the 3rd frame and the cloud with the lightening bolt in the 4th frame.
21.My Life – The last in the series of 6 back to back cartoons where Ansada talks to the reader. I deliberately arranged the 6 together to form a pattern. It is also the first time Ansada answers the phone while lying down.
22.No Start – The Screwball image was inspired by some Bugs Bunny cartoons. Sometimes Bugs Bunny would pause during a conversation, look at the audience, and pull out a signboard depicting a screw and a ball to show that he was talking to an idiot.
23.Cynic – The first time Ansada stands with his back to the audience. I also enjoyed the fact that he simultaneously kicks the phone as it rings.
24.Screwball – Ansada expects the phone to ring as usual, but it refuses to cooperate. When it does ring, Ansada rejoices, which makes the phone think that Ansada’s a little stupid.
25.Float – The first time the telephone demonstrates that it can do more than just ring; it can defy gravity itself. I love the fact that anything is possible in cartoons.
26.Kicks – This is the first time the telephone sprouts arms and legs.
27.So – This is the first time the telephone says something other than “ring”. I also enjoyed the fact that “so?” is a classic comeback when you’re being told off; it negates or trivializes everything that’s been said prior.
28.Reverse – This is the first time the telephone actually loses a battle and walks away frustrated.
This chapter is aptly titled “The Ring and I” (which is a nod to “The King and I”) because it’s the first time that Ansada starts to use words that end in “ring”.
29.Wedding – Ansada knows that the phone is going to say “ring” so he decides to have a little fun by using words or phrases that end in “ring”. In this case “a wedding ring”. Ansada talks to the audience in the last frame, but I did not arrange this one with the others because it was the first time Ansada uses a “ring” word, and therefore deserved to be at the start of a new chapter.
30.Boring – This is the first time that Ansada kicks the phone at the end of the cartoon.
31.Boxing – As in Won-Ten, the currency used is dollars, but I have purposely not defined which (i.e US / Canadian / Australian…etc).
32.Boo – This is the first time that the first frame is not the same as the rest, in that Ansada has his back to the audience (I decided to bring in a little variety). It is also the first time that Ansada runs away.
33.Herrfish – The phone refuses to cooperate and says “fish” instead of “ring”.
34. Disappear – This is the first time Ansada lies down and speaks (in the last frame).
35.Hearing – Ansada picks up the phone before it gets a chance to ring, but the phone takes revenge. I could have placed this cartoon before “Boo” so that it would have been the third cartoon in a row that ends with Ansada kicking the phone at the end.
36.Scoring – No comment.
37.Flush – The phone refuses to cooperate again, which frustrates Ansada. It’s also the first time that Ansada leaves the cartoon and can therefore not be seen in the last frame.
38.Big Ben – As the topic implies, it’s befitting that the phone says “bong” as in to mimic the chime of a large bell.
39.Hypnotist – Ansada holds up a sign with a word that ends in “ring”, so the phone too holds up a sign. Even though the phone doesn’t actually ring, Ansada still gets startled (I thought that was funny).
40.Altering – Similar to the previous joke, Ansada merely thinks of a ring word, and the phone responds accordingly. Back in my day when I was growing up, we had to call the operator to book a long distance call. It’s not something most people in my child’s generation have ever had to experience. It is also the first time that Ansada leaves his environment and takes various modes of transportation to reach Germany. All this while, the wire of the telephone is still attached to the receiver.
41.Distance – Similar to the previous two jokes, (forming a pattern yet again) Ansada pretends to say a ring word, and the phone responds accordingly. Back in my day, the connections used to be less than optimum and there were times when you could barely hear the person on the other end of the line (especially if it was a long distance call). It was therefore necessary to speak loudly.
42.Lights – This theme was similar to “Plumber” but I could not place it there because it required the use of a “ring” word, and therefore belonged in this chapter.
43.Inflated – No comment.
44.Alien – This is the first time another character appears.
45.Access – This cartoon was a hit with friends and family because of the stupid question that is asked, and the classic reply that Ansada gives.
46.Rubbish – No comment.
47.Shorts – The word “nuts” has a double meaning. Children will think “crazy” but others may think …something else.
48.Schwebster – A nod to Webster (dictionary).
49.Hole – I actually first heard this poem on an episode of The Muppet Show, where a guy starts to sing “I think that I shall never see, a poem as lovely as a tree” and then a tree falls on him.
50.NYSE – The E.F. Hutton commercials were often parodied, especially by John Byner on his comedy show called “Bizarre”.
51.Kabooka – I thought it was time that Ansada actually wins a battle against the phone. I also thought this particular cartoon was a good way to end the current chapter.
I named this chapter “Along came Jack” which was a nod to “along came a spider” or “along came Polly”, etc.
52.Jack – It is the first time that Ansada makes a call. Who does he call? Is it his boss? Why is it that this is the one and only time that the font used for that caller is NOT in capital letters? Curious. I wonder who it is.
53.Ripper – This is the first in an ongoing series of punch lines that have the word “Jack” in them.
54.Beans – No comment.
55.Yorjob – It is the first time that someone other than Ansada answers the phone. Ansada thinks his job might be at risk.
56.Meyers – This is the first time that the phone rings so loudly, it occupies the entire frame. No wonder Ansada’s ears are ringing.
57.Sanitarium – The caller seems to be the same person that called in “Mental” because he says the same thing. Jack knows how to respond to such people.
58.Pollution – No comment.
59.Life – No comment.
60.Embarrassing – Till today, I’m plagued by moments in my life that make me grimace with embarrassment when I think about them. I wrote a poem about it 1986, which I then subsequently turned into a song. I imagined Ansada feels the same way sometimes.
61.Drugs – Some people (myself included) sometimes have inexplicable and rather random (and at times, funny) outbursts of expression. Once, I was sitting in a room with my younger brother and a girl who during one of those cocktail moment silences suddenly laughed sarcastically. I asked her why she did that. “No reason.” She said. I found it adorable, and for that (and countless other good reasons), I married her. Jack can’t relate to this behavior and thinks that it can only be as a result of being on drugs.
62.Checkers – It turns out that Ansada is a bit of a sore loser.
63.Hammer – This is the first time that Jack gets startled by Ansada’s sudden outburst. To portray a long pause, it is also one of only two times that two frames (in this case 6 and 7) are exactly the same. The second time was in “Eye4”.
64.Bird Brain – The punch line for this joke was actually inspired by a B.C cartoon, where B.C too flies away like a bird.
65.Pampers – No comment.
66.Affin – Die laughing sounds like “dial Affin”. It is the first time that Jack laughs.
67.Answering – It is the first time that Ansada and Jack collaborate.
68.Blister – My elder brother started laughing at the third frame because he thought Jack got a second startle when the phone rang. He lost it when he saw that Jack was frozen with shock.
69.Major – Jack is a little slow and hasn’t understood why Ansada yells at the phone. Jack tries to do the same, but uses several random words (that do not end in “ring”). It is also the first time that Jack gets frightened by the phone.
70.Bother – Ansada explains to Jack that he uses words that end in “ring” and asks him to give it a go, but the phone does not cooperate. This is the first time that Ansada looks at the audience in the last frame with the crumpled lip expression that would become a mainstay of future cartoons.
71.Foster – Jack successfully uses words that end in “ring” scaring Ansada for a change with his first outburst. I thought it was hilarious that not only does Ansada kick Jack to such a height and distance, but that Jack is expressing his doubts in mid air.
72.National – I thought the way the series of startles were drawn was funny.
73.Swiss – Growing up in Zurich way back in the days before the internet, I remember that if we wanted to know the exact time, we would have to dial 161. The speaking clock (automated voice) would say in German “Beim naechsten Ton ist es…” (At the next tone, it will be…) followed by the hour, minute and second.
The “Eye” character appears as one of the 3 enemies in the Ansada Fone game.
74.Eye1 – Ansada gets frightened into another dimension. I almost felt sorry for him when I drew him standing there, trembling with fear.
75.Eye2 – I thought it was cute the way Iris (the eye character) just appears in the distance (out of nowhere), and then comes close.
76.Eye3 – The challenge for me in this series was that I had a character that needed to show expressions without the use of eyebrows, hair, mouth, shoulders or arms. I had to experiment with the two lines that would make up the eyelids and the iris to create expressions of surprise (as in the last frame of this cartoon), anger, fear, and other emotions.
77.Eye4 – I thought it inevitable that Ansada would get into a staring contest if ever confronted with a giant eyeball. Surprisingly Ansada wins.
78.Eye5 – This is the first time that Ansada introduces himself.
79.Eye6 – Ansada realizes the obviousness and (therefore) absurdity of telling a giant eyeball (of all things) that beauty lies in the eye of the beholder, and therefore stops mid sentence.
80.Eye7 – Because the punch line had “blue eyes” (plural) in it, I had to draw a double eyeball creature. I was pleased with the way Iris’s expressions came out in this cartoon.
81.Eye8 – The words “red, irritated, large, sensitive, beady” could all be used to describe eyes.
82.Eye9 – In the second frame, Lens is actually seen smiling even though he doesn’t have a mouth.
83.Eye10 – It took me a while to come up with a suitable anagram for “telephones”. The one I chose at the end was “The No Sleep” because that tied in nicely with the idea that when someone calls at night, they disturb your sleep (not something that a giant eyeball would like to experience).
84.Eye11 – No comment.
85.Eye12 – The large telephone also features as an undefeatable enemy in the Ansada Fone game. Not only is a large telephone the stuff of nightmares for all the eyeballs, but for Ansada as well.
86.Eye13 – The whole series turns out to be a nightmare for Ansada after all.
87.Eye14 – Again, the words used in this cartoon can all be associated with eyes (bloodshot, eye of the needle, and sight).
88.Eye15 – The words “I” and “eye” are used interchangeably.
In this chapter, it is quickly established how Jack is easily frightened by anything except the phone’s ring.
89.Booth1 – This is the first time that the telephone transforms into something else entirely. Jack gets scared when the transformation happens.
90.Booth2 – This was based on one of the first knock-knock jokes I had ever heard. Jack gets frightened by the knock, but has not yet seen Dr. Who pop out of the booth.
91.Booth3 – Jack freaks out when Dr. Who pops out and promptly faints.
92.Booth4 – Back in the 70s and 80s, many thought of New York as a very dangerous place that had its fair share of criminals and weirdos.
93.Booth5 – Clark Kent would sometimes use a phone booth to change into Superman. Jack gets frightened twice in a row and then promptly faints again.
94.Booth6 – Jack gets scared again when the telephone transforms back. Ansada is visibly annoyed (frame 4) that the old telephone is back, but Jack is relieved.
95.Fire1 – This is the one and only time that Ansada is seen drinking something.
96.Fire2 – No comment.
97.Fire3 – This is the first time that Ansada does a “double take” (frame 2).
98.Fire4 – No comment.
99.Fire5 – Back in the day, not only would we have to go through an operator to book a long distance call, but all such calls were very expensive.
100.Fire6 – I thought that the concept of a smoke signal answering machine was hilarious.
101.Fire7 – I also thought it was funny that George who is so traditional, old fashioned, who lives in a teepee and has never seen a telephone before would own a modern fire extinguisher.
102.Fire8 – It was the irony of having gone through this ordeal of putting out a fire that results in the one thing that George wants at the end and doesn’t have.
103.Battman1 – The “dinner dinner” joke regarding this superhero was one of the earliest jokes I was ever told.
104.Battman2 – I thought Ansada’s hesitation in introducing himself (frame 2) was funny.
105.Battman3 – This kind of reminded me of my explanation for “Drugs”, a kind of random outburst of expression.
106.Battman4 – No comment.
107.Battman5 – I thought the idea of Commissioner Gordon calling Batman on his phone to tell him that he should check the sky because he’s switched on the Bat-signal was hilarious. In the old comics, Batman could not be reached any other way, but if he now has a phone, what’s the point of the Bat-signal? I thought that moment of silence when this is being considered (frame 7) was funny.
In my day we all grew up as huge fans of the old Star Trek TV show. I remember one particular comic that my elder brother had, which showed on its main cover the crew standing on the metallic circular pads where they would be energized. As a child, I found that mind blowing and felt jealous as I so wanted to stand on that pad myself. As I grew older and went to college, I remember being glued to the TV when the very first episode of Star Trek The Next Generation was about to be aired.
108.Trek1 – Here was that pad I so desperately wanted to stand on as a child. The USS Enterprise made me think of USS Dental Prize as it sounds similar. From this name change came the inspiration for this series. Except for his eyes, Ansada’s pose is exactly the same in frames 2, 3 and 6.
109.Trek2 – This was meant to mimic the opening scene of Star Trek, and the spaceship is supposed to look like a tooth.
110.Trek3 – I wanted a name sounding similar to Jean-Luc Piccard, so keeping in line with the theme of teeth, I invented John Toothpick Card. I also thought I would add a smile along with Dr. Spock’s famous four finger greeting.
111.Trek4 – No comment.
112.Trek5 – Instead of Will Riker, I invented the name Will Cleenum (keeping teeth in mind). Will was always referred to as “Number 1” by the captain. What would that make the captain? In frame 5 the captain ponders that question.
113.Trek6 – It seems Ansada just can’t get away from the telephone’s terrible ring.
114.Trek7 – I wanted to have the character of Data, but chose to make him a rather obvious looking robot with substandard abilities. Keeping the theme in mind, I decided to give him a big jaw, and then therefore named him Jaw-Jaw Links (instead of Jar-Jar Binks of Star Wars).
115.Trek8 – I changed Lt. La-Forge to Lt. La-Floss, and I called Worf’s character Officer Fangs (again, both of them teeth related).
116.Trek9 – This is my favorite cartoon of the book. It makes me laugh every time.
117.Trek10 – I wondered if the food replicator machine was capable of creating anything you wanted. This cartoon would be crucial to the story later on.
118.Trek11 – All references in this cartoon have to do with teeth (bridge, cap, crown, white, sensitive). In the solemn oath, the word “truth” is replaced by “tooth”.
119.Trek12 – I thought it was funny that the captain enjoys his job of sitting on his seat saying “make it so” all day long. The word “nerve” is also associated with teeth.
120.Trek13 – No comment.
121.Trek14 – Instead of Ensign Crusher, I invented the name Ensign Brusher (as in toothbrush). My younger brother started laughing when Ansada turns to the audience with his “I don’t believe this” comment.
122.Trek15 – As the Borg’s spaceship looked like a cube, I decided to make the enemy a sugar cube (which is also bad for teeth). Instead of the famous “resistance is futile” comment, I decided to change it to something funnier.
123.Trek16 – I thought it would be a good idea to make the alarm sound like “tooth”. The alarm would then also sound off at wrong part of a sentence, giving it a different meaning (e.g instead of “this is not a drill, this is not a false alarm” it would be “this is not a TOOTH drill, this is not a false TOOTH alarm.”) Also the colours used are associated with teeth as well (all systems white, yellow alert, brown alert). It was also appropriate to use the word “fluoride” when talking about shields.
124.Trek17 – Words used here were also all related to teeth (enamel, fillings). The officer reports all the damage, but to add insult to injury, finally says that they are also all out of mouthwash. That seems to devastate the captain the most (frame 4).
125.Trek18 – Here’s where the replicator machine comes in handy and saves the day. Someone remarked on the drawing of Ansada rubbing his hands together in the last panel and told me that that was a great drawing. I thought it was just about acceptable.
126.Trek19 – The transition from frame 3 to 4 showing the enemy being rattled by the rings of numerous telephones was funny. I had to shade the USS Dental Prize in the 5th frame to indicate the bright light of the explosion. I also appropriately used the word “dissolved” when talking about the destruction of the Sugar Cube.
127.Trek20 – The Captain tells Ansada that his short term memory will be erased as he is transported back. So, did it all really happen? Or did he dream this as he fell asleep in the dentist’s waiting room?
This is how “Dich” is pronounced.